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*crack* *crunch* *thwack* These are the sounds of Steven Seagal entering a room, snapping fingers like they were biscuits, twisting limbs like they were those of bendy action figures, caving guy's knee caps in like they were made of brittle glass. It's all here. Worship it.
Mr. Shatner. Celebrated. His. Birthday. Yesterday. And to show the Captain what a great guy he is and what a great voice he has with...all...those...pauses...here's a bunch of funny guys impersonating him. You will lol.
Bet you never expected to see those two words together: sexy and sumo. And after watching this you'll pray to a cynical God that you'll never see those words next to each other so long as you live. And if you do, that God smites your eyeballs from your skull so you never have to see the ensuing abomination.
Can't be assed to get up off your butt and go travelling around the world? No worries, that's what the internet's for. Just watch this video and then you can pretend you've been to Paris, Barcelona, Berlin, St. Petersbourg, Shanghai, Tokyo, New york and London. Awesome.
Those badgers have been away a while and now they're back with deep baselines to dubstep your brain into the underworld. When did they get so badass and menacing? Guess you got your badger back then.
From the side-scrolling perspective we usually experience when controlling the little plumber it distances you from the action. But what would it be like from Mario's perspective, like in a shoot 'em up? Step up Freddie Wong who's kindly given us a perspective on that perspective.
Well, you have to hand it to this advert, it certainly grabs your attention. Sure it's manipulative and works on those baser instincts but what adverts don't? At least it's up front and honest straight from the start. Right, I'm off to buy a property in Queen Anne Court...
Well, she wins it. She wins the record for the most stunted performance of the most excitable song since some other piece of crud. It's like she's trying to be enthusiastic but part of her being won't allow it, so it comes across like the place enthusiasm went to die.
A great little summary of the art of the title design, you know that bit at the beginning of a film with all the info about who made it and a bunch of other crap. Remember the intro to Star Wars? The yellow-lined words trailing off into the background? Course we do, it's iconic, such is the power of a great title design. Some of them are even better than the movie.
"The cyclotrope is a cycle of 18 images that is spun at a certain speed so that the frame rate of the camera filming it gives the illusion of animation." You got that. It basically amounts to something insanely awesome, motion graphics using a bike, who'd a thunk it?
This guy can certainly rap, he raps so fast it's like he's broken the sound barrier and you're listening to some language from another dimension. Possibly. Give it 5 years and he'll be washed up surrounded by mansions with more cars than gold teeth.
Hotel Hell Game (external)
Time to get all 'Hotel California' and repeat the mantra, "You can check in, but you can never leave", which is true in your case because you are running the place. Keep the demanding guests happy at ALL costs! It might sound like a pretty weird basis for a game but it is strangely addictive as your hotel fills up and your guests get evermore demanding and angry - good luck!
So we've found him, the guy who has the best job in the world. And he most definitely is not a pervert. Hell no. He just will not rest until every woman in the world has the right fitting bra. Because it can really cause them back problems and stuff. Nothing to do with looking at women's bewbs, nothing at all.
This guy is just killing it on the dance floor, busting some moves that would put Saturday Night Fever's John Travolta to shame and make him go crying home to his mum. They know how to have a good time to the dubstep massive. Let's get a shout out.
Either this is some strange time displacement video or that cereal I just ate wasn't cereal at all and instead was a bowl of crack covered with LSD sprinkles floating in liquid ketamine. Either way this woman sure knows how to distort and contort her body. She should be on TV.
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